Extra-Terrestrials in Islam: A Sci-Fi Oddity
A western astronomer and an Arabic philosopher ponder the eternal question: "are we alone or what?"
(/imagine: Two eminent astronomers from the Earth sphere of Poland and Syria – Copernicus and Al Battani – are sharing a plate of orion bhajis and sipping on betal juice, on a desolate desert plain that sort of looks like Tatooine, only there’s just the one moon in the sky)
COPERNICUS
You know what I think? Ptolemy is full of shit. The Earth isn’t the centre of the universe. It’s the sun, it’s plain as day! Only, I can’t say it out loud because that means The Bible is… (looks around nervously) well, you know. What would your lot make of that?
AL BATTANI
Well, my Arab peers at the Falsafa school of philosophy and mathematics are big on Aristotle’s idea of a fixed Earth that’s always been there, bang in the centre, and everything in the universe revolves around it…
COPERNICUS
Oh, to hell with the Greeks! They believed the heavens are giant crystal balls studded with stars like jewels, as if they’re baubles hanging from the Christmas tree cluster of the Monoceros constellation. Pfft! Tell me. What does your book say?
AL BATTANI
The Qur’an also disagrees with Aristotle, as it goes. See, for his theory to work, there can’t be any other Earths in the entire universe, given that even the heavens rely on it to rotate around. If that were true, it’d mean every living thing God created, from humans to the duck-billed platypus, was made to exist only in this Earth and this Earth alone!
COPERNICUS
Are you… are you talking about aliens right now?
AL BATTANI
The Qur’an tells us about Jinns, a whole race of supernatural spirits that were sent down to Earth before Man… sent down from where? It also speaks of the creature called “dabbah”, which dwells in another world. And what did Ezekiel say in your book? “I looked, and I saw a windstorm coming out of the north – an immense cloud with flashing lightning and surrounded by brilliant light. The centre of the fire looked like glowing metal, and in the fire was what looked like four living creatures. In appearance their form was human, but each of them had four faces and four wings.” That’s pretty Close Encounters… if you ask me. And come now. We both believe in demons in hell, angels in heaven! The very definition of an extra-terrestrial is a life form that lives in…
COPERNICUS
Outer space! That’s pretty far out, my man.
AL BATTANI
In surah at-Talaq, it says, “God has created seven heavens, each with Earths like ours.” We are not alone, my friend. Our world revolves around our sun, in our heavenly sphere… there are at least six other worlds revolving around their suns in their own celestial realms.
COPERNICUS
Yeah, the Bible doesn’t really go for that, what with the whole Earth being made on the first day of creation before any other planet or star existed. Genesis makes it pretty clear there’s only one Earth, and that even the heavens are ultimately there solely as the retirement homes for mankind.
AL BATTANI
Then check out surah ash-Shuraa: “And among his signs is the creation of the heavens and the Earth, and all living beings he dispersed throughout BOTH. And he will bring them together when the time comes.” Whether we make it to heaven or hell, you better get used to the idea there won’t be just humans up there. You know, in my lonely fantasies I sometimes wonder whether the “hoors” we’re promised in heaven (oh by the way there’s no mention of 72 virgins anywhere in the Qur’an, but that’s a story for another day), with their wide-eyes and skin that dazzle like rubies, they’re not going to be human women. But more like a Gamora-like alien sex siren of the kind lonely men with popcorn will see a lot of in the future.
COPERNICUS
Wow! Well, after hearing all that, I have to say my heliocentric theory of the solar system suddenly doesn’t sound quite so wacky after all. Although, I am worried about the whole ‘heretic getting burned at the stake’ part.
AL BATTANI
Ah, just go for it. Anyhow, I have a feeling that chump Galileo will take the fall for it…